Why can’t we just let our children do what they want to do, instead of what we want them to do?
About two decades back, began the sheep walk for an engineering degree. Two decades later, the trend continues -with an MBA appended after it. Typically, when parents force ‘The MBA will’ upon their child, this is what goes through the perturbed mind –
Stage I – ‘Ok, let me prepare for CAT. Baad ka baad mein dekha jayega.’
Stage II – CAT tamed.
‘Mom.Dad. I don’t want to study further. I took CAT just to make you guys happy.’
‘Beta, abhi admission hua kahan hain? GD-PI ka preparation toh kar!’
‘Ok’ :(
Stage III – GD-PI cracked too.
‘Now that I have honoured your will, please honour mine. NO FURTHER STUDIES!’
‘Beta, we ask for a meagre two years of your life. Please do not disappoint us. Can you not give us just two years?’
And after a lot of moral, ethical and emotional debate, comes a meek ‘Ok’ from the child.
Finally, you end up in a B-School. What next?
You slowly realize you were indeed correct in your self assessment – this is not where you wanted to be. Of course, you develop a gradual distaste for the curriculum and everything else. The worse thing, however, is that the distaste only grows with time.
Hence comes the eternal dilemma – To quit or to compromise?
Whom do you satiate – the self or its creators?
If you quit, the entire gamut of people – your folks, those nagging relatives, your accomplices, seniors, juniors and even your best buddies – would come down heavily upon you – ‘This is insane!’ , ‘Koi aisa karta hai kya?’ , ‘You must have flunked!’ , ‘Loser!’ , ‘Beta, tumne hamari naak katwa di.’ Also, it would be knaive to ignore the financial loss, let alone the time and energy you put into those Quants, VAs and those Personality Development Programs.
If you compromise, the distaste grows into despair and can break you, literally.
Hence, if you are that annoyed by the ‘B’ life, the Catch-22 situation is indeed palpable.
So, what do you do?
My take – If you can, try falling in love with management : and there are multiple reasons why you can do so. Trust me.
If you still can’t, there’s just one way of quitting and still staying safe from all the travesty – find a ‘better’ career path. One, which everyone around you perceives to be better than an MBA and one which does interest you(Real difficult one, I know). May be, one which gives you more gold at the end of the month or more public awareness : whatever be the parameter of priority for those who will pass a societal judgement on you. Unreasonable as it may seem, it is indeed as practical as it gets – an arduous proposition, but not an experimental one.
The only way, this dilemma can be curbed, is to nip it in the bud. If you are totally sure of what you want to do with your life, convince your folks. Right before Stage I. Tell them what you want to do. Why you want to do. How do you plan to do. And most importantly, How will it contribute to you – in every way.
On the other side, parents also need to realize the importance of letting children do whatever they have a natural liking for, instead of superimposing their own will upon them.
When such synergies are created, half of all management problems would inescapably face extinction, and so would the onerous task of concealing discomposure under the garb of a sonorous giggle! :)
Comments
Jason X
@ the author of this (for want of a better word) article- Apart from this being a largely nonsensical article on a topic that's been debated ad nauseam for the past decade or so... Two things: 1. why do you, use so many, commas? Do you notice, how grammatically incorrect; it is? A - heavy, overdose; of:punctuation"does'not,make.you?a''good;author. It merely emphasizes the fact that the quality of MBA graduates from top B-schools is deteriorating with every passing year. 2. watch: http://youtu.be/owSG_o6SVmo I hope you get the point I'm trying to make. @InsideIIM - do you not proof-read the articles published on your site? Quite a few of articles I've read on here are utter tosh. Maybe something you might consider working on. -JasonX.
7 Aug 2014, 03.04 PM
+Read Replies (1)
Govind Agarwal
Even i dont know....*unpredictable*
Dear Jason X Thank you for devoting your valuable time to this dissertation of mine. It goes without saying that every person has his/her own perception about everything and it ought to be different, based on prior experiences and mindsets. Hence, while you find it ‘non-sensical’, there are others who find it a good read and an eye opener. Of course, the topic has been debated for a while now, but that doesn't make it irrelevant. In fact, I observe its relevance to be growing with each passing day, especially in the context of India. Hence, not only does this need even more debate and discussion but also effective solutions to counter the problems on both sides. I equally appreciate your concern for my verbal abilities. As far as using too many commas is concerned, it is not grammatically incorrect at all. However, using commas or any other punctuation mark, for that matter, at the wrong place, is. What surprises me most about your entire comment, though, is the fact that you judge the quality of B-School students from the number of commas they use in their write-ups! I am totally unaware of the country, region, or the academia who judge the quality of business students by counting the number of commas in their essays, but let me assure you that we do not use any such criteria while judging managers in India, at least. Our assessment of management acumen is more based on the tact used in solving management problems and the results delivered, rather than the number of commas or full-stops used. Hence kindly refrain from making any such assumptions, especially in India’s case. Hope you got the point.
11 Aug 2014, 05.01 PM |
Anwesh Gaurav
One thing which i don't understand is that even at the age of 22-27 one is not taking one's own life decisions then i dont know when they will ever start? After mba when these people get a job and have to face clients- do they ask parents for advice? Why such a dilemma should exist for IIM students is beyond me. IIM grad so called managers cant manage their own lives how will they manage multi billion dollar companies or even have the audacity to think something on those lines.
11 Jun 2017, 02.34 PM