Those were better days weren’t they…simpler times way lesser tension and no pressure to handle. I stood over there wondering why I took the decision of coming here, was I even worthy of standing there, maybe the professors committed a mistake in gauging my caliber, maybe I qualified XAT just because it was my lucky day, maybe I was stealing someone else’s chance who was better than me, maybe I shouldn’t have been here at all in the first place, maybe I really didn’t deserve this.
Then suddenly it struck me, this wasn’t the first time in my life that I was thinking like this… similar thoughts had crossed my mind when I was unable to make it to any famous engineering college, I had lost all hope then, two years of hard work and yet I couldn’t make it, how doubtful had I become of my own capabilities. I had convinced myself that nothing better would happen to me now and that I was destined to failing in all my endeavours.
But here I was standing today in one of the best B-Schools in the country, I remembered the struggle I had gone through to reach here, the sleepless nights, the numerous mock tests, mock interviews, the hassle of managing coaching with semesters and what not. After all, I had admired XL and had given everything I had to make it till here. Then why was I doubting myself again today? After all, I had passed the first test, I had proven myself wrong, I had gotten success.
In that moment I realized, it wasn’t so that I was incapable, it was neither so that I was unworthy but it simply was my fear of failure that was stopping me from believing in myself, I was so afraid of losing at anything that I had convinced myself that I shouldn’t even try. I realized that if I wanted to succeed, I needed to set my inhibitions aside and believe in the fact that I deserved being here.
A lot of students in B-Schools go through such crisis, life becomes tough and coping with it becomes tougher. But one should always remember that there is no way that you could make your way into the finest B-Schools of the country by sheer luck. Sure maintaining sanity is tough but you are capable of handling it and that is the reason that you are here. In any tough circumstance, just believe in yourself and stay close to the people who motivate you and trust me you will do wonders in life.
Comments