Now is no time to think of what you do not have. Think of what you can do with what there is.
"Against the rising waves,
your boat is helpless and tired,
Living one gasp at a time,
Your boat is helpless and tired,
Though the currents are against you,
It's time to make a difference…
Hoist the sail with courage,
This is all about your pride,
Shout ahoy and push ahead,
This is all about your pride…
Powerful storms will shake you,
But If you surrender to a whirlpool,
What good is your might?"
~ Amitabh Bhattacharya, English translation for an excerpt from ‘Naav', a song from Udaan(2010)
This underheard, underappreciated song was my anthem during those solitary nights when the odds seemed stacked against me and all else seemed hopeless. Naturally, whenever I am expected to talk or write about challenges and overcoming them, the movie and the song creeps right into my consciousness.
"Ambition", to be honest, is something I had always lacked during my late teenage years, I did not possess the maturity to pursue targets to achieve ambitious ‘goals'. Naturally, such an approach led me into a graduate program in engineering and a job as a software engineer in an IT multinational corporation, in line with popular trends. None of these were goals I had planned for with deliberation and thought but were consequences of simply allowing time to take its course.
However, my job took me outside the comfort of my home and the nature of work made me realize that this is not something I was made to do or something I wanted to do for the rest of my working life. I felt my talents were being grossly suppressed by the nature of my work as there was no outlet for them. After much thought, I decided that only an MBA from a premier institute can provide me the opportunities I have been looking for, albeit passively, for so very long. I felt that this might be the only way to rouse myself from my slumber and make me go out and do justice to myself.
The realization took time but the work towards this dream had to begin amidst hostile circumstances and had to begin quickly. The pressures of work made it difficult for me to concentrate my efforts on the preparation for competitive entrances. That I had to prepare for the tests meant that I had to close myself off to leisure activities that working professionals generally take on the weekends and their time after office. This made me feel even more alienated and isolated in a foreign city with no close friends or relatives. The only companions who made me keep my sanity where my books and films, but even they couldn't always keep the alienation and hopelessness at bay.
Despite all this, I persisted, just like the lyrics of the song quoted above, I did poorly in many tests but I salvaged my pride in others, there were interviews where I cracked under pressure and interviews where I shone through. The entire process with the pressures of work projects was debilitating physically and psychologically at times, but I am proud I got through it and achieved a goal, which I had set for myself. I envision that this is only the beginning of a newer, reenergized, motivated version of me.
#ABGLP #ABGWOOME #XIMB
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