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“You can't connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards” ~ Steve Jobs
My journey for an MBA began in 2018 April when I bought the mandatory-CAT-prep bundle of Arun Sharma guides and enrolled for the test series offered by CL and TIME. I was in my final year of engineering at DTU and already had a PPO from Amazon. Luckily, I was not in a situation where I had to crack a top B-school and did not have a Plan-B (no pun intended). At the back of my mind I reassured myself that I would prepare while working next year and give it my best effort (foreshadowing). Along with that my semester examinations also got scheduled in such a manner that the date for CAT-2018 fell right between two exams. I decided to treat this year as a practice attempt, to gauge which bracket my score belonged in and how much more effort I need to put in. So far my score in mock tests was all over the place. For example, CL offers a free mock-test before enrolling in its test series program where your score is compared with the highest score and the average score of all the mock-test takers; my test score was more than the previous highest score, and was set as the new highest score for comparison; on the other hand, my mock-test percentile varied from 99.xx to 70.xx. Ultimately, I got a percentile score of 97.xx which fetched me calls from IIM-I and the newer IIMs under CAP. This was a nice experience and I believed that this would give me a taste of how B-school interviews are and what I need to do to crack them. Later I converted IIM-I and most of the B-Schools in CAP which was surprising since I believed that my interviews went horribly wrong. Lesson Learnt: Your perspective and the interviewer’s about the PI can be vastly differing.
Now I had to choose whether to join IIM-I, which had built a great reputation for itself in a short span of time, or to join Amazon and try again for CAT-2019, which was at the time just 6 months away. I was torn between these two choices and the more I spoke to seniors, alumni and friends the more confused I got. The numerous weights and counterweights such as CAT being a highly unpredictable exam, PI being extremely random, increasing preference to non-GEM candidates year on year etc. kept me in the midst of this tug-of-war. Finally, I decided to work for some time and try again in 2019.
When I started working, I soon realized that a job can become quite demanding, especially when you’re a fresher and part of a completely new environment and tools (dawn of realisation). I had spoken to a senior who had cautioned me of this phenomenon. Generally, a UG term ends in May-June, which leaves about 5 months for the candidate to adjust in a new job for the first time, possibly relocate to a new city, and at the same time prepare for CAT. Ultimately, the candidate goes for an MBA in his/her next attempt after gaining 2 years of work-ex. This seemed logical since 2 years of work-ex has been the most rewarded tenure in the weight distribution of composite score for B-schools over the past few years, and the batch profile of almost all B-schools had a major share of students with 2 years of work-ex, supporting this hypothesis. However any work experience is not rewarded in the same way, for example, experience in an IT role is regarded as a non-relevant work experience in some B-schools, in which yours truly had chosen. But it was something that I wanted to experience, and I believe it’s important to follow your heart, to do what you want, and take risks.
It was tiring and at times a bit frustrating to work and prepare at the same time. It felt like I was trying to put my feet in two boats at the same time. At times I regretted denying an acceptance letter from a top B-school and wondered whether I had made a mistake. This feeling would get heightened when I would take the mock-tests and my scores would be worse than previous year’s. I would get frustrated, but I believed that eventually, I would figure something out. I found solace in the fact that this was only my second attempt, and that MBA was not my goal. Instead, it’s a path to achieve my goals, but not the only path.
This year, my CAT percentile score was 98.xx. I was a bit upset because I knew I had missed the cut-off by only a handful of questions. However, this feeling was short-lived, as my XAT percentile was 99.70. I knew my next goal, ace the GDPI round. I was not going to let this opportunity go, and gave it my best. I read up on general knowledge and current affairs, searched formats for GD, and geared up for the next round. I believed that I had a really strong PI as I thought that I could read the room and the panel seemed satisfied. However, I remembered my previous experience, which kept me grounded. Finally, I converted the call from XLRI for their BM Program and will be joining the 2020-22 batch.
Now when I look back, I see all the possible turns my journey could have taken and all the different places I could have been right now. For now I am happy that all the hard work paid off, but it’s the journey, the risks, and self-doubt that make it all worthwhile. I guess like Schrodinger’s cat, we are all in multiple states, and our reality is just determined by the decisions we take.