Well, time always flies away but memories remain. Even though I was very excited about the new aura of life but on the flip side, a kind of melancholy also persists parallelly. Each day passed with a single tick-tock tickling. Daily, a day came and flickered away in a second, and I was becoming more obligate with each blink of the day.
At one moment, when I closed my eyes, I felt the hot, gentle air blowing my hair and gently palpate my cheeks, and I realise it had taken me with it to another time. To another place. To the old days, to the belongings with whom I grew up. By closing my eyes, I clearly saw myself sitting with my friends in Social science Class and teacher reading out us the most wanted chapter of Politics “Democracy.”
I saw myself swinging on a swing in the school, with me kicking my legs back and forth until I was soaring through the sky. I saw myself hiding under the bed on arrival of my father so that I could scare him with a loud “Boo” sound. I saw myself fighting with my siblings just for nothing. And I was seeing myself dressing my favourite doll, amongst other things.
After a moment, I spoke with my inner self - “Hey you’re grown up now, no more a kid.” Alas! It really hurt. Finally, I realised how much time passed away without clues and clause. When we were kids, life was good, simple, uncomplicated, pure; it isn’t bad now, but the character and features have just changed with the fluttering time. Now there’s a pain, expense, responsibility and of course tremendous fun and love too.
IIM Calcutta, a.k.a. Joka, is the epitome of - “It’s not a place, it’s is an experience.” Exactly a week after, at the same day, I packed my bags to substantiate the fact.
When I reached the main entrance gate, I was continuously staring with glittering eyes and a watery mouth like I saw something very delicious; the shining bold letters written up the gate “INDIAN INSTITUTE OF MANAGEMENT CALCUTTA.” I entered the gate, and the feeling of a sense of achievement overwhelmed me.
Everyone was secondly wishing to get into lake view hostel (the luxurious villa and the crown of IIM C) after converting IIM-C. Finally, I got it. God ruled in my favour. And then I thought - why is everything happening at ease? Is life so easy? Nope! Actually, this was just a happy trailer.
The day passes, and the hectic schedule takes off. From orientation to academic session, everything was packed. I was somehow only trying to adapt to this frantic environment. The journey itself had started. Class after class and sessions after sessions began happening. Placement crashers and prep treasure all started at that very instant. Academic pressure was something that started bothering me. I am from a non-engineering background from a not so known college of India. Prevalent things started bothering me about the things I did. Are they really perfect or mistakes of my life?
“Life is not easy, ”someone quoted. I still remember the day when I came to the city. A city utterly unknown to me, but almost as if it was known to me since ages. I arrived at the dawn of that day, the reddish radiance of sun-like equipped me with more vitality. I travelled to the road and breeze was blowing my hair. It was a moment like when two roads converge. The moment when I started unpacking my bags, it was a feeling like I had stepped one step forward in the pursuit of my goal.
It’s not easy to leave our loved ones for our dreams. But I did it. I left my home, my parents, and everything and chose to look away to reach peace of mind. Yes, peace of mind! Why peace of mind? Right? Because the passion I inhaled would give me an immense pleasure that results in my serenity. Peace of mind is generally understood as the roaming in a space where no one disturbs you. But here, peace of mind is the cognition of your passion.
But the day came when I was standing in front of the mirror, thinking about the day that I stepped here for the first time, the day I had dreamt of, the day when I decided to walk through the gates of IIM Calcutta.
The dreamy fantasy of life seems to be very blurred. Is it really blurred or has my vision deteriorated to a point where I was not able to see?? With a hope to deny the fact that I had lost my way, I cleaned my spectacles and rubbed my eyes gently. I was still not able to figure out where I was heading towards? I remember the day when I was a little girl, and my father used to hold my little hand tightly with extra possessiveness. I miss that hand today. I seem lost in the crowd. Tears dripped down my eyes. But I remembered the promise I made to myself to never let my tears drop. I vowed to never feel defeated.
I promised never to feel alone.
But in the midst of all this, I had a special life-line which we all termed as a “friend.” Indeed, they are the most priceless pearls I have ever met though. They kicked me like a cur on my birthday, never let go any situation; like leg pulling was a prime job, defaming rumors about you that they loved to spread out, but this was the only bunch of people I have never asked for help because they have always stood behind me. The hostel was my favourite place, and the classroom was the worst one. Night outs with friends were my favourite hobbies and hanging out with professors was difficult. Relative grading was hard to deal with, but group study was the solution.
When marks became never achievable goals, I didn’t even realize. I realized only when the shitty numbers bearing the capability to judge a person started bothering me. I began feeling bogged down. But I have a good habit of taking a walk after having dinner. I always went for a walk after dinner, near one of the lakes at IIM Calcutta. Roaming there in the light-dark shadows, I always used to watch the buildings of IIM C. The peace it bore in itself gave me a sense of satisfaction, and each glance equipped me the courage to stand up again. I felt low plenty of times, but this place made me feel alive and helped me fight back.
Today, when a whole year has passed with ups and down, I am sitting on a chair, trying to read a book that I have been trying to read for the past half an hour, and finally bumped my head into it. Resting my head on the book, I continually stared at the reddish dusk to dawn and thought about the journey I started to take - my flight from the comfort of my nest. It seems like a journey full of emotions. Sometimes extreme happiness, sometimes extreme disgust, sometimes bitter-sweet feeling but at the end of the day, it is all peaceful!
Childhood taught us to laugh every day at every small thing and to be a hero of your life. Try new things and notice little things. Later on, we may feel pressurised to get a job, to study hard the subjects that we might not even like, or to get into relationships.
But I just remember one thing - none of this is compulsory. Necessity lies in living life to the fullest. The world is full of fun, and one doesn't have to be serious all the time to achieve success.
Life will go on, so will I!
Joka is not just a place. It’s an EXPERIENCE for life.
Comments
Riya Bagga
Great
12 Apr 2019, 03.39 PM