“Yaar BT aa rahi h… DCP nahi ki toh acads ki lag jaani h”
The sentence, most common to all the MBA students, contains 3 words that only an MBA can understand. To all the “facchas” out there, we bring the MBA slang/lingo or what we like to call it- the MBA Speak. The words on which you will bond with your fellow MBA (because he understands your pain) and the words which will drive others crazy (coz they have no hint what are you talking about!)
GAS/GLOBE-: Also known as “globally accepted shit”, this is what you will be speaking in the class, presenting in your slides and writing in your exams! It is basically a simple opinion that is presented in the most exaggerated way and brings nothing new to the table. This is the weapon of those students who don’t have anything to add to the discussion but they must do DCP.
DCP- Desperate Class Participation- The class participation that is done to get those 20 or so marks of internal assessment. Combine DCP with GAS and voila you get the student in the class who wastes teacher’s time (allowing you to sleep more). This DCP is not limited to only classrooms. You can see it in the Guest Lectures or the GLs where this DCP nibba or nibbi thinks that he/she can get the coveted job offer by asking 2-3 questions (on the most cliché topics like AI- ML) from the guest speaker. Well! The truth is always learnt the hard way.
BT:- Bad trip- This is something that even the engineers may know (where you mainly experience it after taking that magical drug!) but in MBA, you will get a BT because you are participating in all the competitions (you have loads to do) or even when you are not participating in any ( the horror of what others will win when you are not participating).
Fachcha-: If you are on Linkedin, you must have read all the “fachchas” sharing their college admit e-mails and the “immense pleasure” that they are getting in it. Are you also one of those “fachchas”? :P
Well, you get it there! The incoming batch or the 1st year students are popularly referred to as fachchas by the seniors.
PPT- For you, it may mean Powerpoint Presentation. For MBAs it has 2 meanings, Powerpoint Presentation and Pre-Placement Talks- both are the bread and butter of MBAs. Pre-placement talks will help you decide your dream company as that is where you get to know the role offered and the stipend/package offered by the company when the recruiters come to “talk” to you! A little DCP may be recommended here. This PPT will lead you to another PPT- PowerPoint presentations- something that you will spend your life with as long as you stay in private sector!
Free Rider-: This will be that person in the batch who is always left when the groups have to be formed and you have to take him/her in the group just because you got to complete the numbers! This person will be the one who speaks about the introduction slide and then slides back as the remaining group takes up the real presentation. This person will not be there for any discussions or for any preparation. Even if he/she is there, he/she will be the silent watcher! This living thing can only be seen active when the groups are to be formed and when the first slide Is to be presented!
Light-le-: The MBA lingo of saying “don’t stress about it” Not getting good grades? Not able to perform well in competitions? Not able to understand why you came to do MBA? Light le! This light-le will eventually lead you to the MBA essentials- chai-sutta! Light the sutta and light le!
Tank-: This tank is not that container of water. It is what you are supposed to do when you have been placed and you have to appear in processes of other companies. You cannot eat your batchmates’ seat. Acing the interviews takes great talent but tanking one takes greater talent. You have to be very talented to be act dumb and appear genuine at the same time!
VUCA-: COVID-19 has made us believe in VUCA- Volatility-Uncertainty-Complexity-Ambiguity. This term sums up your whole MBA journey. You don’t know what will be your percentile; you don’t know where will you get admission even after getting stellar percentile- everything is so volatile and uncertain. Once, you are in there, you have to go through the complex subjects of MBA. However, it will always remain ambiguous if you will be able to get your dream job or not!
Can you think of some other terms? Feel free to put them in the comment box!