It was my 14thbirthday and I had to introduce myself in front of an assembly of 500. I had done it a 1000 times. But this time, I felt the wind gushing around my irrelevant thoughts. I took on the stage with the same smile. I was a popular speaker in the school. I began, “ Good Morning and J….” I smiled it off. I began again. The same thing. 500 people started looking at me in a weird way. I took a long breath and tried again. My ears went red. 500 people and a handful of teachers started laughing at me. I pretended a vomit and ran away.
Being one of the most popular guys in the schools, it was a heartbreak for me. I didn’t speak for a week. Then came the vocal shaming. I couldn’t read aloud for a class. In the next few years, I turned into an introvert. People always made fun of my speech. I used to, sometimes I still do, speak at a higher pace because I felt no one will hear me. My parents sent me to a speech therapy institute. It did make some difference but it took a hit on my confidence. I realized that I wasn’t as capable as the competition. Things got worse.
I changed cities for higher education. Vocal shaming continued. I didn’t remember the last time I spoke to a public. I decided to not tell anyone because if no one knew, there won’t be any vocal shaping. If there won’t be any vocal shaming, I can start anew. And anew I did. I learnt the art of forgetting the dark things. I started participating. I still fumble. I still hesitate. But the next time, I fumble better, I hesitate less.
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