It is the spring of 2018. The sun is ruthless over Madras. There is a leather folder on my shelf. I am twitching, restless, fervid with apprehension.
This is the culmination of months of hard labor. There is no way I can fail now, there is no way I can let my family down. There is no way I can let myself down. A cold sweat runs through me, I take a deep breath and open the leather folder.
“ Congratulation
We are pleased to inform that you have been shortlisted to appear for the Group Excercise (GE), Written Assessment Test (WAT) and Personal Interaction (PI) process round for admission into the two year Full Time Residential Master of Business Administration (MBA), based on your SNAP test conducted on 16th December 2018. “
Will I make it? Do I have it in me? What should I do?
A breeze blows from the mighty Bay of Bengal onto the sun-baked city of Chennai. I ride through the boisterous streets and alleys. I see a peddler selling flowers at a traffic stop, I see opulent german sedans pulling elegantly through the leafy alleys of Thiruvanmiyur. This city is a vivid mosaic of unapologetic ostentation and stubborn, dauntless frugality. In this Country, you could be anyone, who would I be?
The air-conditioning takes me by a mild surprise as I walk into the Pantaloons. I look at rows after rows of finest cotton and linen. They say anxiety is the burden of freedom. I feel the freedom to choose, I feel the burden, I feel the anxiety.
I ask myself, who do I want to be now?
Something catches my eye, it is the color white. In my mind's eye, I see a memory from many years ago, my father donning a white shirt, pointing at the horizon at Juhu beach in Bombay, telling me that is where he works, across the ocean on an oil rig. I pick up a brilliant white shirt and say to myself, I know who I want to be.
The fitting room is a beautiful orchestra of lights and mirrors, I put on the white shirt. I look at the mirror. The flawless white linen hangs from my shoulders and stretches across my chest. It's as if the lights in the room have become brighter, as I button my cuffs I realize I am smiling. Anxiety has given way to excitement. Doubt has given way to confidence. It’s not the linen, it's ME. I am shining. Everything becomes clear.
I will make it, I have it in me, all I have to do is..
Shine on..and on..and on...
