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Transparency Of Other's Success Causes Doubt Of One's Own
The most common reason why any of us have self-doubt is because we are measuring our journey by someone else's yardstick. As a young person in a professional setting this is compounded by many signals.
"My friend just changed jobs and I have been at the same organization "
"My manager started leading a team two years into the organization and I have not been given an opportunity"
"My batchmate just got funding for his startup and I have not even started thinking about my exit plan"
When you're in a startup, it's easy to feel like everyone else is crushing it while you are drowning.
When you're in a large company, it may feel like you will never get far.
Comparison is a fundamental part of our nature and it is also a flaw in how we evaluate things.
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It's Not Just About Intelligence, But Also Perfectionism
Try as you might, you cannot avoid the consequence of information asymmetry. You're always seeing examples of everyone's good news. Everyone else is only showing the positive stuff.
Meanwhile, you are observing the full range of your own experiences. So, it is easy to focus on your negative and everyone else's positive.
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Your Internal Compass Is Either Broken Or Not Accurate Enough
Having a toothache can feel more painful than an entire nation of starving people. Why?
We are hard-wired to think of our own problems as insurmountable, uncomparable, or, unique.
Whereas, we are all equally susceptible to envy, self-doubt unless we nip the feeling in the bud or actively exercise the choice to not feel that way.
Must Read→ Creating A Financial Planning Toolkit As An Early Career Professional
Feeling Like An Impostor Can Be Temporary Or Perpetual
We can't accurately gauge how far behind we are from someone. Hence, we tend to think we are way far behind. Just because someone is a student at 25 and another is a millionaire - doesn't mean that one has arrived and the other can't or won't.
Also Read→ The Golden Handcuff Problem
Self-doubt Can Damage Your Relationship With Yourself And Peers
You will always feel like you are drowning if you continue to feel like an impostor. You will resent colleagues who do well and feel dissatisfied even when you are successful.
Therefore, it is imperative that you move away from a mindset of feeling "not good enough" to "constantly becoming better every day."
How Do You Overcome Impostor Syndrome?
- Take feedback. Asking colleagues, family, clients about how you are doing can give you a good sense of direction rather than deciding you are worthless.
- Keep stock of all the good things you have done so far. Often, when we feel like, we are jammed - we forget how often we have felt jammed before.
- Recognize everyone experiences it. Your CEO resents being left out of an industry achievement list. A top musician hates that a newbie won a Grammy in the category they were nominated for.
- Practice gratitude for what you have (employment, health or a successful relationship) than focusing on what you may not have temporarily (say a very high income or a challenging opportunity).
- Don't crib. Do. If you feel that your impostor syndrome is justified and you are legitimately lagging behind - just get out there and start working hard to make a difference. Cribbing and battling negative emotions will not help you as much as getting a 'headstart' on success.
Read Next→ Like A Boss: What Every Early Career Professional Must Know
Hope this post was a good read for you. Watch out for the next article in the Headstart series soon. Share these posts and leave feedback, requests, and suggestions in the comments below! Connect with me on LinkedIn here.
Disclaimer: All views expressed are personal. All information copyright with author. Protected under Creative Commons. This is not a substitute for professional advice.
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