I don’t know if everyone thinks the same but I have always felt that my life was difficult than others. I had to go through lot many struggles from my childhood onwards that made me feel like struggles have become a part of my life and it began to scare me when everything went right sometimes.
When I was in college, I happened to join an IEEE, the world’s largest professional organization. I was very much impressed by the kind of work the IEEE volunteers do and became a part of the student executive council of our student branch. I was super excited as I got an opportunity to do everything that my seniors did but what welcomed me was disappointments. In a world where external factors favored people than skills, I had to see the dark sides of favoritism. I felt bad not only because others had people to support them but also because I was just a name in the executive council.
A few months later, I came across a volunteer call for IEEE Job Fair. I applied for it and was chosen to become the firm relations volunteer. Unfortunately, I had to give an interview for the Kochi Hub Team, a 5-member student committee that monitors the IEEE student activities of five districts in Kerala. I gave the interview is very sure that I will not be selected because there were many excellent candidates than me but a few days later, I received mail congratulating me for being selected to the Hub Team, something I haven’t even thought about. I cried, not because of joy but of anxiety. I didn’t know what to do. For a moment, my world became still. I became scared thinking about how I will handle such a responsibility. I even thought about rejecting the post but I didn’t only because of a few seniors of mine in IEEE.
I happily presented the topic in front of my parents. I was sure that they might be proud to hear that their daughter is one among the 20 students selected from the 4000+ student members in Kerala. But what welcomed me was a big NO, something I didn’t expect and from there began the long story of my struggle in IEEE.
Few months after our team was formed, we had to conduct various big budget events for students. Our team also introduced a large project for school students in our hub incorporating 25+ colleges, 12+ schools, and around 100+ volunteers. It was such a big project that many people were looking forward to how it was going on. Things were going smoothly but suddenly something unexpected happened. One of our teammates met with an accident and ours became a 4-member team. Weeks later, when the workload increased, our team lead left the position without informing the authorities. As members left, the workload on the 3 of us increased. Due to greater pressure, the other 2 members became inactive and I was the only one left in the group.
The entire responsibility of handling the activities of Kochi Hub was on my shoulders. I couldn’t handle the pressure. I had to manage my college and student activities. I had to travel frequently which my parents were reluctant to fund me. I had to find my own ways to fund for my activities and I started participating in Best Manager competitions. Luckily, I won several of them and that helped me with my pocket money. Opposition from my parents was the hardest. Whenever the phone calls with officials went long, they would come near me and scold me for them to hear so that they won’t call me again. Slowly, people started passing comments about my parents and started acting sympathetic to me understanding the fact that my parents won't fund me. The kind of embarrassment I had to face made me feel like I was stripped in front of them whenever I met them. But I had to move on. Every time I had to travel out of my hometown, I had to quarrel with my parents and make the senior faculties to call them so that they will send me. Eventually, it became a routine for the senior IEEE officials, the highly qualified professionals to call my parents to send me.
But I had to move on. I had projects to be completed. I successfully completed the project for the school students called ENLIGHTEN which was then carried out in the other two hubs in Kerala and this project is still being continued. I had to organize a Congress for students. I didn’t felt like complaining because I was scared of complaining. But people were watching me, a fact that I didn’t know. After the Congress, I was in a position that I no longer could handle the workload. I decided to quit from IEEE.
A month later, it was time for the Annual General Body Meet of IEEE Kerala Section. As it was a late night event, my parents didn’t allow me to participate in this. Again, I had to make the seniors call my parents to send me for this. After a great fight, my parents allowed me to go for the AGM and there, I received the biggest ever recognition that I received in my entire life, the Outstanding Student Volunteer award of IEEE Kerala Section. The first ever lady to receive this award and that too, just after completing 2 years of IEEE Membership.
I still remember that moment where I received the award. Till that moment, I used to question myself why I worked so hard? why I struggled so hard? Because I had no benefit. But when the senior most member in IEEE Kerala Section came to me, patted on my back and said" we were watching you Ansu, we are proud of you", I felt that I got the answer for all the questions and struggles that I had to face.
Whenever I look at the memento at my home, It reminds me of the struggles that I had to go through. It was difficult for me but the kind of learning I got in IEEE had helped me and continues to help me in every phase of my life. Moreover, it also taught me the lesson that your hard work will be recognized one day.
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