#ABGLPWooMe#TAPMI
Every individual would have faced some or the other challenge in their life. Be it small or big, bad or worse, fatal or not, everyone would have a story to share. My story is not about a challenge that I have successfully overcome. It is something which is an everyday challenge. I think it will always be co-existing as long as the Indian society doesn’t change.
I come from a traditional middle class family from Kerala. Land where people boast about the literacy rate and the picturesque beauty it holds. I’m a proud Keralite, but with all due respect I still feel that not everyone has come out of the conventional societal traditions which includes caste system, gender stereotypes and superstitions to name a few. In my family I might be the oldest girl who is not married and doing higher education. We are all programmed to think in a particular way depending on the gender of a person. Even at the age of 3 or 4, a girl has a natural inclination to like pink and a boy to like blue. That is how the society is shaping us.
I started fighting with these labels during my early childhood. I could always be seen in trousers and shorts among other boys who were my friends. I had a bob-cut till my eight grade when my dad stopped taking me to the local barber shop. When I joined engineering, I wanted to take mechanical engineering to pursue my dream of taking a masters in sound engineering. But my relatives opposed to the decision. I started realising that being a rebel takes a lot of courage and it meant hurting many of your loved ones. When I got a job, I intentionally chose somewhere out of my state, not to see other parts of India but to not face the continuous pressure of marriage. I did not know how to rebel against my parents, so I chose to run away from it rather than face it. When a girl completes under-graduation, she has successfully crossed the first step of getting married. Better yet, when she has obtained a job and completed at least 6 months, she is at the verge of being rumoured as a girl with some physical or mental damage as she has not yet been married.
After 29 months of working at one of the biggest management conglomerate in India, I learned about different kinds of people I would have to face in my life. That is when I decided to go for my post-graduation. During every visit to my town, I get a lot of questions like, ‘Did you learn to cook?’ to which, often I want to answer, ‘I went to study management and not cooking’. But society has taught all the girls not to talk back and respect your elders even when they do not sound practical.
Girls are also human beings who wish for their freedom to chase their dreams. Wouldn’t they want to be given time to settle in life? I’m glad that many parts of India is going through a healthy change against such labels and stereotypes. Also, thankful to my mom and dad for upbringing me and my sister as independent and strong individuals. A simple wish is for the next generation to not force their kids to choose between pink and blue according to their gender. Boys can look good in pink too!